Three strategies on how to make the right decision for you.
When I met Jenna, she was struggling with the decision whether to take a nursing job she had been offered in her hometown or pursue an amazing learning opportunity that would relocate her across the country. She found herself stuck in the “I don’t know what to do” circle of doing nothing. She was afraid if she could not make a decision, she would lose the chance at both opportunities and be left at square one.
“I don’t know what to do” is a phrase I hear often in relation to career choices or changes. Which college is best? What should I major? Is this the best relationship for me? Should I have children? I even noticed this same theme in my own sporadic journaling. At least until what I fondly refer as my “cracked wide open” day. Uncertainty can be a debilitating feeling. Especially when you are stuck between taking steps, or even knowing the right direction to go.
As an intuitive coach, I encourage people to recognize and listen to their inner voice.
Work through obstacles. Consider options that may not be immediately evident, to achieve one’s true potential with passion and purpose. This process takes different forms, depending on the beliefs and values of the person involved.
For the planner, making a pros and cons list works well.
However, I encourage digging a little deeper than just listing the pros/cons and tallying up the totals. Each pro should be considered in how it relates to a core belief or value. Each con should be challenged to turn into a positive. Oftentimes, if a con cannot be turned into a positive, it typically means that it violates a core value or belief of the person. Therefore, this should be taken into deep consideration.
Jenna is a planner. In Jenna’s case, her value on continuous learning seemed to place the cross country job as the obvious choice. But in contrast, her value for family connection and being present for family events was significantly more important to her. Jenna revisited her local position, within the framework of learning opportunities. She concluded that if she stayed local, she would be able to pursue higher learning opportunities sooner than if she took the cross country job.
The thinker has a tougher time assessing intuition.
A lot of thinkers don’t think they have intuition – or they hold the belief that they should just “know” the right answer. So, engaging intuition is achieved through a forward-thinking process. I like to frame the options at hand within the 1-5-10 approach. Where do you see yourself in 1 year, 5 years, or 10 years? OR how will this get you where you are wanting to go? Again, digging deeper, how does this align with your values and your life?
Feelers decision making from intuition is about trusting signals from their body.
Notice how your body responds to each option. Do you feel the excitement? Nervousness? Uneasy? Does your heart flutter or race? Do you have butterflies or a knot in your stomach? Do you feel heavy or light? Is there uncertainty, hesitation, or a feeling that something is just not right? Trust these feelings because they often lead you to the decision that is more in alignment with your values and beliefs. But you need to know what your values and beliefs are to gauge this appropriately. For this example, a person who places a high value on an adventure might feel their heart racing with excitement while considering the cross-country opportunity which would be completely different than the heart racing of someone who values familiarity and consistency.
Some people, (present company included), need a combination of all three strategies to feel confident with their decisions. My husband reminds me to “own my crazy”. That’s because he knows that even though it make take me a little longer to make a decision, I place loyalty as a high priority value.
So, when I am bought-in to a decision, it is almost impossible to convince me that I will not benefit somehow from the decision I have made – even if it is one of those lovely lessons of life.
So . . . until next time . . . own your crazy! Meanwhile, connect with me, so we can discover just what that might be!